Friday has been the final straw.....
Work sucked.
My friendships suffered.
My partner scolded and "clocked" me.
It is Friday, 5:30pm.
Everyone else I know is at home or out with family and friends, and I am still at work.......
I am trying not to be upset.
I am trying to hold it all together.
I don't know if I can.
My heart is broken. My spirit is not far behind. My soul is aching......
I know, GROW UP, Be a man..........
I spend every day of my life trying to hold my head high.
I try to be the best I can be.
I try to be everything in life I am destined to be.
I just always fall short of that goal.....
My life since January 30, 2008 has not been easy.
Transitions.
Lost friends.
New friends.
No solid family.
Job that pays nothing.
Complete lack of anything tangible that I can hold in my hands to say "it is mine".......
I am not complaining.
I am not crying wolf.
I am just tired of trying so hard for it not to be enough.
Everyone that matters to me states, "it is fine, you will pull through".
Just don't lay your life on me, or make my life uncomfortable.
I know I have love in my life.
I know I have love in my heart to share.
I just want to feel as if "anything" I am doing at this point matters?
Is my "prime" life time gone?
Is that crazy?
2 comments:
Friday was not an easy day for many. I looked around the table at happy hour on Friday and noticed that people were tired. The "Honeymoon" process is over at school. The kids are starting to act like kids and that seems to piss me off.
But the true frustration is THAT ADULTS ARE NOT ACTING LIKE ADULTS.
Everyone needs to know they are doing a good job and just the smallest jesture can accomplish that goal. Why can't our BOSSS' see that and do that.
Well it is Saturday morning and what a wonderful, quiet and beautiful start to a day this is.
I am going to take advantage of th is weather this weekend and spend as much time as I can outside.
Have a great weekend everyone, we ALL DESERVE IT
Rodney,
I totally understand the not being able to hold it all together anymore. I am tired of trying.
just remember, you are awesome and made me smile when i needed it. :)
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